Outside the Castle
by Sunmin4530
Summary: You see someone in school and you'd think that's all that is with that guy but when you see him outside the castle, well, there'd be a revelation to be revealed. James Potter/Severus Snape.
1. Chapter 1

**Warning** : Graphic depiction of domestic violence, verbal lashes, curses, uxoricide(is this right spelling?), and perhaps adult materials like sexual intercourse that is happening between m/m, former enemies turned lovers, OoC, because of course some level of distortion in their characteristic is required to make nemesis to love each other, I'm not native English speaker, this fiction will come up only once in a while when I'm feeling like writing it.

 **Disclaimer** : I do not own any of the characters in this fiction, this is purely for my entertainment and hopefully yours as well. I do not gain any money out of this.

* * *

It always starts with the trivial. Severus would try to avoid encountering his father or his mother, or both of them but in the process of avoidance he ends up encountering them. Then, there would be small details that bother his father, followed by his mother's reprehension and subsequent arguments.

His father does not like to be argued.

The end is always with violence. The old, gangly man would raise his tough hand and strike her down. For such a skinny, unfed man, his blow hurts quite a lot.

Severus, for all his despise and disappointment towards his mother, would try to get between his parents, willing the man to step aside. And fail, miserably. And all that is left of them would be covered in black and blue, sometimes red as well. Well, not sometime. Everytime.

The youngster hates his house, hates his family, hates his life.

All he knew about life consisted of bitterness and pain, and hatred. Eleven years, such short span of life has taught the dark-haired boy nothing but bleakness and sordidness. The villainy his life has educated him was all that he was aware of.

Until he was introduced to a girl.

A red haired girl with bright green eyes. Such vibrant colors were so unfamiliar that they almost stung his eyes. She was beautiful, joyful and compassionate.

Compassionate.

A difficult concept to comprehend for the bleak boy.

But she was compassionate. She was compassionate enough to care about him, enough to stay with the boy even after every other friend had left him in disgust. The red-haired girl never laughed at his ridiculously filthy, ugly appearance. Never. Instead, she would feel sorry for him whenever he was hurt, whenever he was lonely and scared.

She would comfort him, allow him to lie next to her, bask in the sight of her.

The single beautiful memory the gloomy boy ever had.

But one thing life has taught him was unfairness. That life is never fair, never justice. Severus knew that of course, but each time he has the sharp reminder of the lesson he was hurt greatly.

That was when James Potter entered into their little companionship. Hogwarts, which was supposed to be his escape, his savior, his new life, was painted with bleak and dark colors when Potter was introduced.

It was just too much for him to take.

To be stolen of what little happiness he tasted was too much painful for him to take.

It was not that Potter found it amusing to throw some hexes at him, not that the dunderhead ganged up around him to mock and humiliate that made his life at Hogwarts difficult.

Mockery and humiliation are something he was well acquainted of.

But to be stolen of the girl he cherished, loved, worshiped… That was something he could not endure. So here he was, lost amidst his own misery, wondering the eerie castle astray. He didn't know what to do with his life, what to expect from his life.

His initial response to Lily's attraction towards Potter was to gain power enough pull her back. Gain something more than the empty-headed boy possesses due to a good fortune.

But every time he tries exactly that, every time he thought he has earned something James Potter can't have, Severus was forced to face the truth that none of it mattered. None of the things he gained mattered to his dear flower.

All Lily sees, all that Lily perceives was just him: James, the golden boy of Gryffindor.

He was just not good enough. No, he was just not him. That was it. That's the problem: he was not James Potter.

The realisation hurt. It hurt.

Severus could no longer bear the pain of it.

"..."

Perhaps he should just stop… trying. Stop pretending to believe that everything he does will finally make a difference. Perhaps he already knew it all along that nothing he could do would make his life different.

A cold breeze brushed his thin figure, chill creeping up his spine. Severus shivered. He had not realised he was outside of the castle, wondering alongside the lake. The still water was reflecting the round, pale moon. Beyond the lake was the dark, foreboding forest which reminded him of a monster's large gaping mouth.

For a moment, he actually thought he saw something move inside the dark forest. Something dangerous. But it couldn't be. He was still quite close to the castle and whatever lives inside the forbidden forest was forbidden to come out. They never come close to the castle.

Brushing off the thought, as he rationalized himself, Severus took one more glance at the lake before turning back to Hogwarts. He might be getting himself into troubles by encountering the caretaker. He never liked the skinny old man who brews unhealthy amount of affections towards a red-eyed cat.

Then, the sound came. The horrible, frightening sound of something rushing towards him. Ragged breaths, thuds of pounding foots, an animalistic growl and snarl, all of those terrible feeling crept up to him when a giant fur-coated beast leaped toward him.

"What-...!"

Even before he could scream, the thing was in mid-air, bearing his razor-sharp teeth, its amber eyes glowing dangerously in the dark air. He should've run, he should've pulled out his wand to… to do what?

An inscription he read from countless books crossed his shocked mind.

A werewolf.

There was nothing he can do to a werewolf at this close distance. Even if he could, the Slytherin boy was paralyzed in shock to react.

He was done.

It was his end, and he was sure of it. In the millisecond of him realising his end, Severus could see no one but Lily. If only he could say goodbye to the redhead…

"Stop Moony!"

A hasty cry pierced his grief-clouded head, forcing his attention to the origin of the voice. And there he was, the golden boy of Gryffindor, the one who gave Severus such devastation that he absentmindedly roamed around the castle in the middle of night. But he was too late. The wolf was too close. Severus tried to move himself but his legs were frozen on the ground, one step back and he stumbled onto the ground.

Severus yelped in pain, wincing as his head and back collided with the hard ground.

He squeezed his eyes shut, fearing his own end, expecting the worst. Snarling and growling noises were so terrifying.

When nothing he expected came, he slowly opened his lids. The sight in front of him was absolutely terrifying. A large wolf and a black dog were clashing with each other, clawing and biting. Snarling noises accompanied with pained growls were so loud that he wondered for a brief moment how come no one awakes at the sound of them.

Then something touched him, nudging him to stand up. Severus peered and found out it was a large, handsome stag with magnificent antlers. With its black nose, the stag hurriedly nudged him, poking him to stand. The bewildered boy forced himself to control his shaky legs and up himself. The large, gracefully curved antlers gently pushed him away from the canine fights.

When Severus was fully up and started to run away from the beasts, the stag followed him into the castle, where it turned into a human form.

Severus nearly fell to the ground again at the sight of the bespectacled Gryffindor boy.

"-you…!"

"There's no time, Snape, you've got to move!"

"Pott…!'

Severus couldn't force himself out of James Potter's grasp on his arm, pulling him towards the inside of the castle. The taller boy did not stop until they were inside, hidden in the dark corridor.

Panting hard, the Slytherin boy tried to catch breaths. He couldn't believe what just happened. He was out in the lake and was attacked by a werewolf and then saw Potter… There was a dog, large enough to fight wolves and a stag… which was Potter?

Was Potter a stag? No, no, that's not the word. Severus mentally chastised himself for stupidity. Animagus. That was it.

Potter was an animagus.

He looked up to the taller boy. Potter was wiping sweats off of his brows, frowning and muttering something incoherent.

"You're an animagus?" the question was out of his mouth before he could stop.

The Gryffindor boy peered down from his glasses, eyes a bit widened. Then, he muttered profanities, hands ruffling his stupid hair.

"You just saw, Snivelly, do you need an explanation too?" Potter said, resolutely.

Severus ignored his insults, too much in shock to care about it.

Potter was an animagus and the werewolf… that must be Lupin, Severus remembered the pet name the dunderheads use, Moony. And if that is so… that large black dog must be Black. Sirius Black.

Piecing the pieces together, Severus figured out what he just saw.

They were the Marauders. He just witnessed the Marauders in their other forms. Well, he couldn't remember seeing Peter Pettigrew but still.

Trying desperately to compose himself, Severus met the hazel eyes. He could see the hint of fear and bewilderment adorning them. Potter was fearing Severus might rattle. And sure, why wouldn't he? He was just attacked by one of the most dangerous dark creatures and learned that said dark creature is the friend of his tormentor.

But something hindered him from going straight to the headmaster. Well, the partiality the old wizard displays is one thing but there was more…

Severus couldn't believe or think that he was grateful to the enemy who constantly inflicted pain - not necessarily a physical one, just because he saved him from his own deadly friend.

"Hey, I know that this is all freaking weird but you can't tell anyone," hurriedly Potter said, interjecting Severus' thoughts, "I know that this freaked you out, but you can't."

Severus had no response to that.

Potter frowned deeper.

"I'm dead serious, Snape. Just don't," warned the taller boy.

When that didn't give the response he wanted, James closed the distance between them, towering the skinny boy.

"I just saved your life, I mean, we just saved your life so don't go thinking that you might get us into troubles for this. Even you wouldn't be so shameless."

But nothing came.

James frowned, wondering if the usually spiteful boy gotten so scared that he might actually faint upright. Just when he was about to poke his finger at him to make sure, Severus gave a short nod.

"I won't tell anyone."

Whispering his fragile answer, the Slytherin boy distanced himself from James and walked away. The bespectacled boy tilted his head to a side, one eyebrow shot through the head, dumbstruck at the unexpected yet pliant response he hoped to receive.

An Imperius curse? Or there might have been some sort of accident during potion class that perhaps changed his personality.

A suspicious look adorned his handsome features, eyeing the twitchy little spider-like boy.

Was there a curse that changes personality? Or perhaps the essence of one's soul?

But then there was a squeal from behind, letting him know that Peter got really scared, and he turned away to help his friends.

Yet the look on Snape's face was so unfamiliar, so unusual that it lingered on his mind even long afterward.

* * *

Hey, I'm back with a James x Severus fiction.

Hope this will be fun for you!

Thanks for reading.


	2. Chapter 2

With the new knowledge he earned from the terrible night, Severus could have purged this castle of the Marauders. And yet, here he was, pretending nothing have ever happened. Severus couldn't be sure why he have done nothing to use the knowledge against Potter but he felt no desire to.

Perhaps it was because he no longer felt the need to get rid of him. It was so blatantly sure who Lily was going to choose, no amount of efforts on his part will change that. So why would he? He could spend the rest of his life hating and blaming the damn golden boy but what good it would do?

Hatred, the dark, persistent feeling seated deep inside his belly would only wear him out eventually.

It will never be paid, it will never be satisfied. It would only dig a deeper hole in his chest and just… rotting him from inside out.

Giving up on his revenge, or something he used to like to call 'get even' had Severus void of purposes. He was now emptied of every hot-raging goals of shooting down the Quidditch star to the ground, humbling him to his knees.

How ironic was that now that he let everything go, including earning Lily's affection, he realised he lacked purposes for the future.

Not knowing what to do with his life, not knowing what to do with his voidness, Severus slowly sunk to himself more and more. Severus never hung out with anyone but these days he even seldom got out of his bed. His body felt like a cotton ball absorbed too much water, sagging down. Or sinking down.

It was then when Evan Rosier approached him.

Evan Rosier, a light brown haired boy with a pair of blue eyes, was the exemplary pureblood boy. Impeccably organized, well-educated, well-behaved, a proud, self-absorbed pureblood who always looks down on others. Severus included.

Or so he thought.

"What do you want?" asked Severus, convincing himself the fluttering feeling in his stomach as to be the annoyance, not intimidation.

Evan Rosier gave a small smile, "you've been missing at breakfasts Snape."

"So…?"

"Are you unwell?" The light-haired boy asked, tilting his head.

Quite startled at the fact he even asked his regard, Severus simply shook his head. He thought the other boy would leave immediately, thinking that this was just a cordial from well-brought up boys are taught to do.

But then, a cold hand found his forehead, feeling the warmth, surprising him.

"Perhaps a visit to Madame Pomfrey would do you good," suggested Rosier.

Dumbfounded, Severus could find no voice to response. Taking the silence as yes, Rosier pulled him up gently guiding him out of the dormitory.

Severus tried to push him away, wanting the comfort of bed again, but found out skipping meals for nearly two weeks in a row, barely eating more than a bowl of soup a day, had weakened him considerably.

He had no strength left in him to push away the taller, surprisingly more muscled - how had he gotten himself so toned? Severus don't remember seeing the boy in the Quidditch team - boy.

* * *

In the hospital wing, the only thing Madame Pomfrey did was to chastise Severus for skipping meals and made him promise her that he would eat regularly, and Rosier to take care of him when he does not show up in the great hall.

They've walked back to the dorm in silence. Severus glanced at the boy, wondering what the boy was thinking.

All in all, it was simply the most awkward moment in his life. … well, not exactly, but still.

Weird things do happen, Severus learned that from past few weeks. The Same thing recurred against his will, Rosier would seek him out when he was in the hiding - well, he wasn't meaning to hide, per se, and drag him out of wherever he was. The well-respected pureblood boy always takes Severus with him. When he was eating at the great hall, when he was going to classes, even when he was out in the town he would bring Severus with him.

At first, Severus was just annoyed. The only thing that kept him from telling Rosier to leave him alone was the fact that he was in no position to do so. Slytherins, though close they were, had dynamics within. The purity of blood was everything to them and to outrightly ignore their dynamics would ensure unhappy school life afterward.

Then, things changed.

Severus learned to adapt to Rosier. Though he wouldn't say that the boy was likable and compatible, as he was quite volatile in temper and cruel in nature, but he was trying to be nice somehow.

Merlin knows why he was trying to be nice to Severus, but some semblance of affection was doing Severus good. He felt… at least, not as void as he used to be.

So he began to enjoy Rosier's company more and more, growing to like the guy. Not as strongly as he felt towards Lily, but still enough to develop a friendship.

Yet, there were people who disapproved of this companion.

Lily Evans.

Severus couldn't fashion why she was so dead against Rosier, even though he made him less possessive of her, relieving some of her pressure she felt when he was being clingy.

"I don't like some of the people you're hanging around with," she declared.

Bewildered by the unexpected statement, Severus frowned.

Crossing her arms in front of her chest, the redhead continued, "I'm sorry, Sev, but I detest Avery and Mulciber. Mulciber, Sev, Mulciber! What do you see in him, anyway? He's creepy!"

She flung her arms in desperate motion, which made Severus uneasy.

He concurred that Mulciber is a detestable person, and he hadn't meant to hang around with that large, crooked teethed boy either. But he was Rosier's… friend, of a sort. They just came in package.

When he spoke nothing, she fixed her deadly gaze at him, "do you even know what he tried to do to Mary Mcdonald the other day?"

Unconsciously, he defended Rosier's friend, "it was nothing. It was just a laugh, and-"

"It was dark magic," interjected Lily, "and if that's the kind of humor you think you'd enjoy-"

Frustrated at the continued accusation and weary of her vehemence, Severus spat out, "What of the things Potter gets up to? Of the things he does to me?"

The memory of himself hanging upside down in the midair crossed his mind. It happened more than once before, and she didn't call that Dark Magic then.

"What's Potter got to do with any of this?" Lily frowned, quite disturbed at the mentioned name.

This got Severus mad, face turning red and seething. But he suppressed his anger. No matter what he does, he'll never win that stupid athlete. She'll never choose him.

Sighing, Severus whispered, "nothing."

* * *

It was one of ordinary days when James Potter spotted a familiar figure sitting by himself under a tree. The lanky boy stuck his nose in a giant volume, matted locks of dark hair curtaining his face. It was Severus Snape.

He eyed the boy carefully.

The Slytherin boy was so skinny. His height was not that pitiable, but the limbs were so thin that the school uniform, which would have fitted perfectly well to other boys in his stature, hung loosely as if it were covering wood sticks.

To be honest with himself, James was quite surprised that none of the incidents happened in a few months ago never got out.

Remus was horrified at the accident. The fact that he might have killed somebody, albeit Slytherins, or hurt somebody scared the shit out of him. It literally took several weeks to get him calm. Wait, no, scratch that. Moony wasn't remotely calm, still. He would wake up in the middle of night screaming and then go on ranting about how monstrous he was. The brown-haired boy would blame them, too, if he hadn't been so caught up with self-loathing. He consistently tried to encounter Severus Snape so that he can make up for his mistake.

But the lanky boy was nowhere to be found, hiding in the dungeon.

...which, driven Remus even crazier.

They kind of expected Snape to rattle, going straight to the headmaster. Yet, no words from the old wizard appeared to be safe to assume the older Gryffindor was oblivious to their predicament.

It is fair to say that last few weeks, months, actually, were a living hell for the entire Marauders. They were living on edge, terrified at their mistake.

It was purely a mistake, honestly. They didn't know they were getting that close to the castle, albeit imagine someone would be there. Well, the latter part was inexcusable, he supposed. But honestly, they were so caught up in their chasing game that they've forgotten how dangerous a werewolf can be near human.

It scared him, too.

It scared all of them, really.

Afterward, Remus refused to leave the haunted shack, sticking to his original - and by original he meant 'stay stuck inside the filthy, dust-filled room, trying to mutilate himself to death- method of going through the moon.

But he was not the only one suffered. James was having a hard time as well, wondering what might have happened if he had gotten there late, even for a bit.

He supposed it might be best if he should talk to the boy (James couldn't stop from frowning at the thought) so that he can be sure Snape was alright. And…

And apologize for their mistake.

James shivered at the image of him bowing to the smug-faced Slytherin crossing his mind. But he inhaled deeply, bracing himself. If his father ever taught him to become, it was to be brave.

Hence, the bespectacled boy marched through the meadow towards the tree near the dark lake where Snape was sitting…

"Severus."

before stopping himself when other voice called the loner boy.

Snape looked up from the book, his face lit up as dark eyes met the blues. And he heard his heart thudding against his chest.

The straw color haired boy beamed at the dark boy, sitting next to him.

"What are you reading?" whispered Rosier.

Snape lifted his book from laps, showing the other boy the title. James couldn't make the inscription from where he stood but Rosier looked impressed.

The two Slytherin boys chatted away like there were only the two of them in the world.

And James couldn't stand to linger there. He turned around and headed back to somewhere else.

The thudding heart seized to pound but instead, it felt like something very cold and sharp pierced through it. Which was weird, wasn't it? Why should he be feeling that? Maybe there was something wrong with him. Physically.

Trying to brush off the feeling, he dashed towards the castle.

* * *

 **A/N** thanks for reading


	3. Chapter 3

" _Here_ ," said Rosier as he handed a box wrapped up in silk.

Severus looked down at the pretty box before opening his mouth to ask, but was quickly shut when the other boy silenced him with a look.

He took the present and unwrapped it. Inside the box, there was a handful of seeds. Round, pale brownish colored seeds. It was an ingredient that he wanted to get a hand of for months. It was difficult to attain the magical seed not only for its price, but also its near zero-availbility. Though the seed contain potent magic, but it was so hard to harvest it.

The dark haired wizard couldn't believe Rosier was giving this to him let alone managed to acquire one.

Seeing the bewilderment in his eyes, the taller boy gave a short smile.

"Do not be so surprised. I am actually bribing you for a little favor."

"A favor?" Severus asked.

The grin on his face deepened.

"Yes, a favor."

"Which is…?"

"To accompany me in a small social gathering that will be held when the vacation starts. I would like you to be there with me, all expense will be on my part, of course."

The vibrant blues glinted, giving the other boy a shiver.

Though he couldn't tell why, but Severus finds the presence of the handsome boy uncomfortable time to time. He'd brush it off as silly idea, yet this time, he felt more keenly that he used to. Perhaps that's because Rosier was too domineering. He'd likes things to be done as he wished them to be. Saying no was never likely to go smooth with the pureblood.

But then again, why would Severus refuse a moment to escape his parents' house at least for a while?

So he gave a nod, showing his agreement.

"Find, when will it be?"

"I'll owl you when you get back home," said Rosier.

* * *

The semester ended and all the students went about to their own homes. Severus, of course, was one of them. Usually, the thought of going back will haunt him like madman. To think that he must spend the holiday with his father was absolutely atrocious.

But this time he had some thing to look forward to.

An invitation.

From a boy whom he never expected to be friend with. He was not complaining, though. Rosier maybe a vicious, cunning boy as all the other purebloods are, but he was quite intelligent and gentle. Well, at least when he wants to be.

The truth is, he cannot understand why Rosier would want to be with him. There is no merit in befriending him, Severus knew. The analytic boy was sure that all that friendship and companionship among the Slytherins were not as pure as they would like to believe. The school was an organized replica of actual social stage where the participants learn how to perform within. The politic rules the replica and every participant tries to make a connection for their future's sake.

Having a quality that attracts people is what makes them valuable friends.

And Severus, compared to Rosier, has none.

He is neither rich nor famous. He possesses no charms that enable him to build good connections. The only thing he may have is his skill in potions, but he doubt that Rosier would find such quality a fitting asset to his connection.

However murky his stance is, Severus was sure of one thing.

That he was grateful to the pureblood for occupying his mind. He rather have his head spun wondering about Evan Rosier than have his mind sinking into its deepest part where he constantly beat himself up for not being good enough to Lily Evans' the significant one.

The invitation won't arrive soon enough, Severus thought as he laid down on his back, sprawled like a rag doll. His face was covered in blood from his nose, lips cut, his body bruised up and sore.

It always starts with nothing.

He tries to avoid his parents but fails, his father would find something displeasing about him and beat him up for it.

But everyone knew Tobias was doing what is was doing because of his own misery. Their wallets are thin, the job hunts are grueling and unrewarding. The man's tired, frustrated. And angry.

He's always angry.

And when he is angry, no one benefits from it.

Severus wondered about Rosier's gift to distract himself from the pain. There was no dittany, no potion to alleviate the soreness. He was not allowed to use wand. Which was ridiculous, to his mind.

Why couldn't he use wand to protect himself against this foul creature that he is forced to call father?

But the rules are rules.

And Severus didn't want to call attention upon himself at this state.

He suddenly missed his friend. What would Lily say when she finds out even after all these years of Hogwarts, he still gets himself beat up by his own father. Would she think he's useless and stupid for not protecting himself?

No, no. She would never call him stupid. Severus, despite all the pain she inflicted upon him, knew very well that she is the only decent person in the world.

But he felt stupid nontheless.

He wished he could just banish his father somewhere out of his sight.

He wished he could just…

The imagination flew like that, leading him to where he knew he would never reach, for he knew very well he would never harm his father with his own hand.

Never.

* * *

The invitation was delivered, finally, with a complete set of dress robes. Thank Merlin that none of his parents were present when the owl came.

He already spoken to his parents - meaning his mother - about staying at his freind for a couple of days. His mother didn't exactly approve of it but that did not matter. He will go either way.

Severus took the enclosed portkey and was quickly found himself in front of a large mansion. It was really, really large. With its cool-colored appearance, the building looked regal and ancient.

"Severus," a voice called from behind.

He turned to face finely dressed Rosier greeting him.

"Thank you for accepting my invitation," he said.

"Thank you for inviting me," Severus returned.

They entered into the mansion together, a few exchanges went about their days in home. Severus had much little to talk about, so he let the other boy to rave about his own divine family.

The two Slytherin went inside and were greeted by many of fellow Slytherins. But to his surprise, Severus found more than just fellow housemates. There were others, too. Soon, he realised the gathering is not about Slytherins or the followers (as he half suspected) but purebloods.

Nothing to be shocked at all, come to think of it.

Yet, he still couldn't manage to shake off his shock at the sight of James Potter with his loyal dog, Sirius Black.

"You haven't told me what's this gathering is about," Severus dared to ask.

Rosier turned, "Hmm?", looking up from his champagne glass, "Oh, it's just a tedious meeting with a flock of people."

People, he say. Not purebloods.

"Do you have this kind of meeting often?"

"Sometimes," he answered with a wicked smile. Severus couldn't tell what was the smirk about. But he took the drink from Rosier when he offered.

The party went on like that, the two of them talking trivial stuff, enjoying the drinks and foods. Severus pretended he did not see any of the Gryffindor fools. However, it just his luck wouldn't let him get away.

"Snape," a low voice called, as if surprised by his presence.

Why wouldn't you, Severus thought to himself.

"Potter," reluctantly, he acknowledged.

"What are you doing here?" Potter asked, looking up and down him.

Somehow, the eyes laid upon him felt too keenly than they should. Feeling uncomfortable under his gaze, Severus tried to walk away from him. It was just stupid of him to think to find a hiding place in a mansion he knows not very well. Some official worker who's about in his twenties took Rosier away, clearly uninterested in Severus. He got that same look on more than few people tonight. That look told Severus that he was not fit in this kind of gathering.

That look gotten into his nerves and Severus wanted to take a moment in private. But such as his lucks, he encountered blasted Potter boy.

"Are you here by yourself?" Yet, the stupid troll with a pair of glasses couldn't take a hint.

"No, I must go back to him," Severus averted his gaze from the troll and tried to find Evan Rosier through curtains.

Potter followed his gaze and searched the hall for his companion, "Him, who?"

The question sounded very absurd to Severus. "None of your business."

"Fine, whatever." The Gryffindor sighed, ruffling his well-combed hair. His hair got ruined immediately, and for a short moment, Severus thought it was a shame.

"Are you hiding from the crowd as well?" Potter asked after a while, looking down behind the glasses.

Severus frowned, "as well?"

"Well, I wasn't in such a mood to deal with all that nobility crap. Sirius probably have fled the place hours ago." He said it in a way that makes Severus feel dumbfounded.

He didn't response because he couldn't think of anything to say. Then he realised he was lingering without any real reason and tried to take his leave, again. And failed, again, when Potter caught his arm.

"Hey, could we talk-"

Severus gasped in pain, as the other boy's hand pressed exactly where his father gave him a large, purple bruise. Seeing the pain etched in his face, Potter let go immediately, taken aback.

"What the- hey, what's wrong?" Potter asked, reaching for his arm again, to see what was wrong.

The Slytherin boy tried to take his hand away, but the taller wizard was physically stronger than him. He quickly pushed up his sleeves (which was fairly easy considering it was quite loose around his arm) and found the purple bruise, along with several scars and marks.

The bespectacled boy gasped in surprise.

"Wha… What are those…" He continued to lift up the sleeve, and when he found more wounds, he tried the other arm which were filled with extreme bruises. Severus, of course, tried to wriggle himself out of the grip. On the process of trying to free himself, though, James Potter caught a glimpse of the back of his neck.

Undoing the buttons of Severus' shirts, Potter got a view of his back. The pale expanse of flesh was covered in horrific wounds: lash marks, boot prints and round bruises.

"...let go, LET GO OF ME!" Severus screamed.

The desperate voice pierced through his ears. Potter let loose his grip. He cannot believe what he was seeing, he cannot believe this could have happened to someone. To Snape.

"What is going on?" A low voice growled behind him.

Potter found Rosier glaring at him, gripping the curtain as if to rip them off.

"Did you do this to him?" He asked, pointing at the shivering boy. Severus looked disturbed, scared even.

He wanted to leave the place but the only exit was blocked by the two boys.

Rosier inclined his head, unaware of Severus' injuries, "what are you talking about?"

A hand shot up and grabbed Rosier by the collar, "I said, did you do this to him?"

Frowning, Rosier tried to pulled out his wand before he took a glance at Severus as Potter's finger directed and was utterly shocked to find countless black and blues.

"Wha- how did that happen, Severus?" He stammered.

Which was something, considering the proud pureblood never stammered in his life. Seeing the genuine shock, Potter loosened his grip. Yet, he was still out of his mind at seeing Severus Snape in such a terrible condition.

The two pulled apart, each trying to approach Severus. But the other boy wouldn't let them.

"Severus, what happened to you?" Rosier asked, reaching for the boy.

Severus didn't want to talk about it. Quickly doing his buttons, he shook his head and tried to weave himself through the two other wizards. "I must go, Rosier. Thank you for inviting me," he muttered.

He was caught, however, by a strong hand of the Chaser.

"You are not going anywhere, you need help."

"Let go of him, Potter," Rosier spat.

James snickered, "or what? Can't you see he really needs help? His entire body is covered in bruise! We should call my father-"

"And do what? Have him search … where? Do you even know where he lives? Better question yet, since when did you care about him?" With a snarling voice, the brown-haired boy retorted.

"I've always had an impression that you relish in his torment, James Potter. Tell me if I'm wrong."

"That's different, I would never-"

"Never what? Beat him to death? But I've seen some of the dangerous hexes you've thrown at him-"

"I'm sorry, were you there? 'Cause I don't seem to recall your presence backing up Snape in moments of help. And now when he does, you pretend I'm the only one inflicting pain?"

"Why you-"

"Enough!" Severus cried.

Both the arguing boyes startled at the pained voice.

"Both of you stop it and let me go."

"But you need help-" Rosier whispered gently before cut up by Severus' glaring look.

"I said, let me go."

They had to back off, allowing the fragile boy escape the fiasco.

* * *

 **A/N**

I'm trying to make this complicated triangle... but I'm terrible at it.

It's like my go-to story line, isn't it? Have three people mingled in awkward and tensed relationship.

Oh well, I'm not a very creative gal.

Anyhow, this is going to be happy ending. I want happiness for my dear Sev.

Thanks for reading! And thanks to y'all coming back for me!


	4. Chapter 4

It was a day after when another delivery made to his house. The packet consisted of various potions along with a note saying 'Sorry for the inconvenience at the party, hope you would accept my apology.'

Of course, they were from Rosier.

Severus sighed, pressing his temple where vein throbbed. He, too, concurred James Potter's words.

That sentence is something he'd never thought he would utter in his life but it was true.

Rosier never did anything to help him before, so why now?

There might be some hidden motives Severus couldn't see through. There might be something he hadn't notice but the other Slytherin have percieved as a leverage to use. But that doesn't make any sense. Severus knew himself quite well. There was nothing, especially now that he quit making himself valuable to prove that he's worthier than Potter to Lily.

All he has was his ability to make a decent potion in class, which might serve as a way of making a living in the future.

Was that it?

His ability to make potions?

Is that what drew Rosier closer?

The confused boy surveyed the gifts, trying to make out a message hidden in them. After a while, he had to admit there was nothing he could deduce.

* * *

Potter was feeling shitty. He never feels shitty, except when something really, really bad happened. The last time he was this shitty, he snuck a few items from his father's safe in which loads of confisticated magical items were laid. They were honestly the worst things mankind ever invented, not entertainment-wise, he admits, but safety-wise. The Marauders could've burned down the entire vilage with them.

So why was he feeling worst?

It has something to do with memories of a party held in few weeks ago. It was a gathering among old and historical magical families, also known as pure-royal pains, where he encountered an unlikely person to meet there.

Severus Snape.

What was it with the boy and him? They always end up crossing each other's path, albeit unintentionally. Well, scratch that. More often than not, the intentional part was there when they encounter. …. in school, that is. Obviously. Because why would he stalk that scrawny, dirty-haired Snvielly to a bloody party?

They chase each other because they want to get back at each other and nothing more.

But that had changed as well, when the thing happened and he learned his lesson. All of them, even Sirius, sort of felt impressed and, and, …. thankful when the Slytherin never spoke of the incident to anyone. Of course, the unknown reason behind the silence was unnerving at first. Though, they have came to conclusion that Severus Snape won't spill the beans to expose their secret.

That was the reason why he wanted to talk to Snape. To express his bewilderment as well as gratitude. Also to make sure Snape won't speak about the matter in the future.

The dicovery he uncovered was excruciatingly shocking.

All the purple and red marks adorning the pale flesh were terrifying. The skinny arms which one hand could envelop very easily were no improvement in the situation either. The boy was wrecked. Damaged. Hurt beyond he could imagine. James was a Chaser, he knew what physical blows could do, how much pain they could cause. And he knew, for sure, that those marks were made by blows, multiple blows.

Someone was beating him up, in muggle method, not in wizard duel.

The image of black and blues haunted him.

And perhaps not so surprising, it made him want to help the poor boy.

Working on an impulse, Potter stood up and went his way to get to the Snape's.

* * *

He got the address from his father, a load of ass kissing involved in the process. When he got there, Potter was rather stunned by the eerie look of it. All worn down and shabby, the house looked as if it might fallen apart at any moment.

James walked up near it, attempting to go and knock the door, notifying the Snape family his arrival. He was going to say he was his friend, but than again, sudden fear arised. What if Snape's parents wouldn't want him in their place for bullying his son? Well, _not bullying_ , per se… because it was mutual aggression, he could swear. But no, somehow he doubted Severus Snape told his parents about the entirety of their relation.

And what happens when no one was there? Or better yet, what if Snape's not there?

Why had he came here anyway?

Just as when the impulse deflated as well as his resolution to help the boy, a sharp noise came from the house.

* * *

This year was starting to get worse and worse by every minute. Not only did Severus experience near death by werewolf, but his father's behaviour was getting extreme. The beating continued, incessantly, his mother's sanity was at stake. Severus lost count of how many times he witness his father hurting his mother, and his mother sinking into a lower state of mind. He feared for her and for himself. He feared that his father would finally cross the line one day and his dysfunctional bond between family shattered.

And as if people were right when they say be careful what you think.

The worst fear manifested in the form of accident. Drunk accident.

Tobias was wrecked and he was even more vicious than ever.

Time after time when Tobias learned about magic, he was amazed by the fact that a witch couldn't better her life through magic. It was strange, because every fucking fairytale instructed that a witch could produce mountains of golds and treasures with a flick of her wand.

His wife had a wand. She showed it to him. But she refused to make golds for the family.

That wretched bitch would rather have her husband die out of starvation than use a very simple trick of her wand and make everything better.

It amazed how witches could be a selfish, psychotic and cold bitches.

Bitches need to be punished, need to be instructed who is the master and who is the inferior.

And so the blow after blows, he heat his wife with his fists, palms, his belts and crow bar. Everything and anything he could hold his hand on, spewing out his anger and frustration. Every dirty emotion rotting inside, every ounce of darkness fostered in his mind was poured out.

Nothing could stop him, nothing ever should.

Tobias was blind and deaf and dumb. Every sound came out of his mouth was hoarse bellowing and no sound penetrated his anger-filled brain.

When he finally could see pass the fog of rage, all he could see was red.

His hands were covered in red, the floors and the furniture were also red and… Oh god, is that his wife? The pulp of flesh, convulsing futily, vein-bursted eyes void of life. Some horrible sound caught his attention, keening noise with a shaky tone.

It was coming from him, Tobias realised.

He backed off, staggering.

And the pair of black orbs took a proper look at the body below. It wasn't just his wife, there was his son on top of her.

His son…! Lying half dead.

And that was when the offender heard the hard knock on the door, which blew off the shabby door.

"What…!"

"Snape!"

A tall young man burst into the living room, pointing a stick at him. Tobias could see the horror and worry plastered on the young man's face. A hand reached out to check on his son, hazel eyes scanning for signs of life. When the boy was sure Severus didn't die, he shot up those glaring hazels at the culprit of the mess.

"Wh-who are you?" Tobias stuttered.

A frown crumpled the handsome face, "What the fuck are you doing?! You could've killed him!"

An anger bubbled up again at the accusation, riling him up. "I asked who you are little rat, barging in my house, yelling at me!"

"I'm his friend," the boy spat, "you nearly killed him and that's all you have to say? That's honestly- Oh never mind, get out of the way!"

The bespectacled boy put his arms under his son's body and lifted it. Holding the unconscious boy close, he rose and started to walk pass the wild man and out of the door. Tobias could do nothing but gawking. His lips quivered, eyes stung with tears. He cannot believe what just happened. The shock paralysed him. Only the sound of some sparks crackling in the air woke him from it to stare down at his immobilized wife.

There was no sound of breathing, no sign of moving, just… nothing.

She was dead.

The murderer collapsed to his knees.

Soon later, his bloodied living room was swarming with people with funny clothes and wooden sticks.

* * *

Severus woke up in a room where he did not recognize. It was dark outside the framed windows. Inside the spacious room, there was expensive furniture decorating. He have been in other Slytherin's room before; rich Slytherins. But he couldn't recognize any of it. Nor does he remember ever entering this room. All that he can recall was… his father hurting mother, him trying to get between them, harsh blows on his face, his body…. And…

Where is this place?

Just when he was about to panic, a familiar figure entered.

"Potter?" Severus whispered in disbelief.

James Potter acknowledged him with a rueful smile.

"Hey. How are you feeling?"

"Why are you here?" He eyed the taller boy suspiciously.

Sheepishly, the boy sat besides the bed, "uh, you are at my house, Godric's Hollows. They didn't know where to take you, so my dad invited you in."

"They?" Severus questioned.

Potter nodded, "the aurors."

"The aurors?" Severus now felt like a retard for repeating the Gryffindor's words like a parrot. But he cannot help himself with the overwhelming knowledge beyond his capability to understand. Why was there aurors involved in this conversation? Why his father would decide to invite him in? And why in the Merlin's name would he require to find a place for Severus when he had a perfectly sound place of his own…

Wait.

"What happened to my parents?"

"... your father's in custody, waiting for a trial. In a muggle's facility. And your mother… well, she is…" The bespectacled boy trailed off, his face filled with sadness and worries.

The image of beating crossed Severus mind again. It was bad. Really bad. Tobias was worse than usual, and his mother was too fragile.

A fat tear rolled down on his cheek. James Potter squirmed in uneasiness. "Hey- I-uh, I'm really,"

"She's dead?" It came out more of a statement than a question.

James could do nothing but nod, confirming it.

"Um, I-" He tried to say something but nothing came up in his mind. What could one say to a former, wait, no, it might be current- archenemy who just lost his family?

He shut himself up and waited, pondering whether to leave the guy alone or not.

It wasn't really that long when the silently crying boy opened his mouth.

"How did I come by here?" he asked.

And here it goes, James muttered to himself.

"I was on my way to your place when that happened."

"Why?"

"I- um, I just wanted to tell you something and… just happened to be there when it was all over. I called the aurors as soon as I realised what happened." He explained.

"Tell me what?" Severus interjected.

Potter clamped his mouth. He didn't want to talk about it, not when this boy was this distressed with all the…

"Tell me about what?" He prompted.

The Gryffindor boy swallowed thickly.

"About the incident with Moo-, I mean, Remus, and how I feel about you not telling it to the headmaster." He added, "I just wanted to say thank you for not telling anybody."

Severus scoffed.

He felt like laughing out loud at that.

 _Thank him_? Seriously?

He didn't do it for the wretched monster, he certainly didn't do it for James fucking Potter either. He only kept his silence because he saw no need to. Not anymore.

But what does that matter anyway? His life has just shattered once more. The small fragment of whatever peace or normality in his life broke completely. He now has nothing. Nothing at all. And his ambition to get James Potter expelled is so insignificant in comparison. What does it do to make things better for him, anyway? What sort of pleasure he would get in throwing the golden boy out of the school? He'll still be rich and he will still be able to get whatever he wants. Nothing will dampen the boy's fortune.

All the while his own life will shatter on its own just fine without anyone's help.

"Hey, hey, Snape, you alright?" Potter shook his shoulders, worries etched on that perfect face.

Severus wanted nothing more than to strike it.

"Get out," he spat.

Looking dejected as well as angry, Potter stood up without a word and got out.

Severus curled up in the bed and wept silently for the losses torturing him.

* * *

A/N

Hey I'm back

Sorry for making Severus to suffer but I had to make him stay with James.


	5. Chapter 5

The next morning, and the following afterward were nothing less catastrophic. Each days passes and all Severus do is staring at the air numbly, not eating, not talking, not doing anything. Which concerned everyone in the Potter's mansion. Mr. and Mrs. Potter have been very kind to the boy but it appeared nothing penetrated the traumatized youngster. Although they had no real obligation to take care of their's son's not-so-much-a-friend, they've decided that they will be the one to look after the poor boy.

They saw the pain and hurt in the fragile boy and believed housing him in an orphan place would do no good at all.

Since then, Severus Snape started to stay at Godric's Hollow.

It was weird for James to have a former- wait, no, he's still- no, not really… He has no idea what to call Snape anymore. He certainly no longer hover any ill feelings after what he saw but they are definitely not best friends.

But somehow, the notion upsets James.

Perhaps more than it should.

So he tries, as best as he can, to get under the other boy's barrier and establish a real relation with him.

A friendship sounds a lot better.

* * *

If anyone said to Severus Snape that he'd be living with Potter in the past, he would have brushed if off as lunatic. But here he was, staying throughout the entire summer vacation with the Potter's. Nobody cared enough to notice that he've gone missing. There was no other place for him to go. Strangely enough, those two were perfectly sound reasons for Mr. and Mrs. Potter to let Severus live with them.

Living with your mortal enemy shouldn't be that easy, yet, somehow, Severus managed not to complain. To be brutally honest, it really didn't matter where he stays.

Numbness devoured Severus since the day he heard his mother's death. Nothing ever came to as important, not anymore.

He was sinking down, down and down.

Everything felt surreal as if he were seeing through a thick wall of glass.

Other times when he was not feeling numb, he felt scared. Scared of being unable to feel anything. Scared of himself not wanting to do anything. Scared of the emptiness he felt.

He was afraid that he'd might off himself one day, without even thinking about it.

* * *

"Is he coming down?" James looked up from his plate when a concerned voice questioned.

His mother was furrowing his brows, fine wrinkles across the forehead. The bespectacled boy followed her gaze and looked through the kitchen entrance. There was no sign of the guest. He sighed.

"I'll go bring him," said James wiping his lips with a napkin.

Mrs. Potter nodded, "please do so, I'm afraid he'd might starve himself again."

James huffed out his agreement. These past days have been a struggle for them, too. Though the Potters took the responsibility as solemnly as they can, they also started to realise the grimness of situation. It didn't waver their resolution, only made it stronger. Yet, they can't help but feeling worried as time passes.

Sometimes, it just seemed impossible for the recently orphaned to recover from his loss and open up to them.

But the Potters were nothing but persistent and brave. Nothing will deter their resolution to help the struggling boy. During these demanding days, they've began to feel more than simple responsibility as a dutiful civilian, and started to develop genuine concern and caring for the poor boy.

James entered Severus' room without knocking because by now he knew that the other boy won't mind. He just doesn't care about anything anymore.

"Mum says you need to have supper. Come on." He reached out and pulled Severus up. The Slytherin was spacing out again, staring at the window.

It bothered James very much that the other boy was pulled up so easily without a resistence. He was so light and fragile. Even more skinny than before, too. As if that was possible.

While clicking his tongue unconsciously, James noticed the two black orbs staring right at him. It gave him a surprise, for they've never met anyone's eyes before.

"Are you-", James stopped himself before he could finish the sentence.

Though wanting to ask 'are you alright?', he bit himself back because he knew Severus was not okay.

Thankfully, Severus went down to the dining room without further prompting. But something felt off about him. Staring at the back of the other boy climbing down stairs, James wondered what was wrong.

It has been a very long vacation for the Potters and Severus. James had to restrain himself from going out too much, feeling weary of leaving the distraught boy alone with his parents. Although he and the Slytherin boy never been friends, they had decided it was better if Severus was accompanied by someone acquainted to, not strangers.

Evidently, James did inform his friends about the new addition to his family.

Sirius freaked out at first, but so was Moony and Wormtail. They've all began to accept that it was responsible to help someone in dire need, regardless of past animosity.

The more he stayed with James' family, the more James realised how indifferent he was to the boy's character. Despite his belief that all Slytherins were supremacists as well as emotionally deprived psychopaths, he could clearly view how wrong he was about Severus.

The boy was damaged.

He was hurt badly and now suffering the pain, struggling under the suffocating miseries.

James learned that he might have overlooked the pain in the past. The image of Severus Snape in the past has been… well, nothing like what he is seeing now. Not this vulnerable, maimed, distraught orphan who looked like he might jump out of a window suddenly.

The awkward, lanky boy who loves dark arts and cruelty was gone from his sight and all he sees now is a defensive animal trying to cover up wounds.

When they were seated in the dining room, Mrs. Potter had to hold back her fretting. The boy was getting thinner every day, and it felt like it was her fault. No one really blamed her but she was a naturally loving character. It was almost a second nature to Mrs. Potter to take care of those who are in need.

"Please help yourself, dear. The houseelves outdone themselves tonight," said Mrs. Potter.

Severus took a spoonful of soup in front of him, without a word. And another, then another. When the motion did not cease, James and his mother secretly let out a collective sigh of relief and started with their own supper.

In admist the silent yet somehow not-so-dreadful meal, the usually quiet boy opened his mouth.

"Mrs. Potter, may I ask a favour?"

Two pairs of startled eyes stared at him. A small smile adorned Mr.s Potter's lips before she opened them to anwer.

"Of course, how may I help you?" She asked.

The gloomy boy met her warm gaze and responded, "I would like to visit where they buried my mother. I think it's only right for me to pay her my last farewell."

Sadness flickered through the woman's warm gaze, which was concealed quickly.

"If it's not too much a trouble, of course." Severus added.

"Oh, no, no trouble at all. Of course you may go, would you like me to accompany you?" shook her head and asked, leaning a little bit towards Severus.

"Oh, I'll go with him, mother." James interjected.

"That's a lovely idea, James." The middle aged witch beamed.

A faint hint of discomfort flashed Severus' feature but it turned to indifference when he nodded in agreement.

* * *

The cemetry was eerie and dark. But then again, everything in the Spinner's End was eerie and dark. Deprived of wealth and humor, hence the liveliness of people, the place was nearly looked deserted.

Severus gazed the cold, grey stone with least elaborate ornaments. Only a name and a life span. When she was born and when she died. Severus was amazed how far time has passed. It felt like a moments ago for him.

He laid down nothing in front of his mother's grave. There was nothing to give in the first place. James Potter had asked whether he wanted some flowers but he declined.

To be honest, they've never been close.

He never had any relationship with his mother that is any semblative that of James' with his mother.

His mother was weak: she never protected herself against the violence her husband inflicted and neither him. The marriage had sucked the life out of her and she was holding onto the faintest hope that one day, things might be better once Severus was out of sight again. But she didn't survive through that.

She died, tragically.

It could have been avoided, if she decided to leave her husband and choose the world of magic again where she can be powerful. Her name would be enough to gain respect perhaps not fortune. The Princes are now diminished to one little half-blood heir, but had she reengaged herself in the market, she might have gotten herself a new husband. There were people who coveted the Princes in order to maintain the purity of lineage.

All things consider, it was really her fault that she died.

And now he has no family left.

He didn't know whether to get angry at her dying or get griefed by it.

Up until now.

A hot drop of tear rolled down the pale cheek. And then another, then another until it turned to stream. Severus didn't bother to wipe them out or hide them from the specter.

He was sorry his mother was dead.

He was sorry she suffered.

He was sorry that he was alone, and that she left him on this world alone.

But she was gone, and he was here.

He needs to decide whether to go on with his life or follow his mother.

A strong hand suddenly grabbed him by the shoulder, pulling him towards the other boy. Severus' nose bumped into an expand of hard muscle, which he realised it was a chest. James Potter's chest. Severus looked up from where his head was forcibly buried, meeting a pair of very embarrassed yet very concerned hazel eyes.

"Don't look up, you stupid," muttered James, looking sideway.

Severus noticed a red tint on his ear.

That notion suddenly made him laugh, despite the circumstances. It came out like a giggle which turned to a laugh mingled with sobs, later died out as stifled whimper.

James hold the sorrowful boy in his arms, stroking down his thin back.

* * *

A/N

Too soon?

Oh well, I don't want to write about slow development. That's what I tried the last time and I thought I was going to die writing the progress.

This time, it's all about fun and fluffy love life! Love! Jealousy! Severus blushing! Yeah!

Thanks for reading and if you could spend a bit of moment to comment, that would be great! Thanks!


	6. Chapter 6

Moving on from losses is a tough task, but not as much when there's help. James Potter did everything he could to help Severus and his family did too.

Life isn't fairytale, though.

Grief just doesn't disappear with one round of emotional break out. Reality's much more demanding.

But the Potters were patient, and understanding.

They've grown to establish real bonds with the poor boy and were happy when they witnessed hints of progress.

One thing changed for sure, though, and that was James' relationship with Severus.

During the process of helping out, they've made peace with each other, overcoming whatever ill feelings they were brewing. It was surprisingly easy to do when you're basically thirsting for emotional connection. And straightforward apologies issued when demanded did their parts in relinquishing grudges.

"Hey, are you ready?" James asked.

Severus gave a quiet nod, finishing the last luggage.

"You boys come down already, you'll gonna be late!" Mr. Potter shouted from the stairs.

"Coming, father!"

The two boys scrambled down with loads and followed his parents to their car. When they are at the station, the Potters bid farewell, seeing their son off as well as new addition to their family. Although Severus didn't reciprocate their heart warming goodbyes, he at least showed his courtesy.

In finding seats through compartments, Severus found himself seated among the Gryffindors. The Marauders were all there. And they stared in an excrutiatingly awkward gaze. Suddenly he realised that they were former enemies.

The compartment felt encaging.

Then, an arm slung around his shoulder, cutting out the scrutiny he felt. Severus looked up to meet James' worried gaze.

"You alright?"

A pair of hazels glinted under sunlight. And for a short, stupid, mortifying moment, Severus thought they were beautiful.

"Hmm?" The bespectacled boy prompted.

Shaking himself out of his reverie, Severus gave a constricted nod.

"Tell me if you aren't, okay?"

"Okay." Severus muttered.

He stared outside of the window to divert himself, slightly uncomfortable with his thought. He felt the arm around his shoulder very keenly.

Severus tried to space out, blank out the absurd idea that crossed his mind.

* * *

"Wow," Sirius blurted out.

James shot an annoyed glance at his friend, mouthing 'what?'

Sirius shook his head in fake 'nothing' but kept one murmuring wows.

The train went on steady pace, and they were all felt relax bit by bit. Severus dozed off after a while, his health gotten a bit straining with all the turmoil he went through. He starved too many times and despite recent recovery, he couldn't regain his full health. Though James suspected he never been healthy in his life, judging by the sallowness on his cheeks.

That's when Sirius started to blurt out again.

"Wow, Prongs."

James rolled his eyes, "wow what, you dog? Could you start speaking in full sentences or it is too much to ask?"

The retort was returned with a smirk, "Seriously? Severus Snape?"

Moony chasitsed him with a nasty glance, "Sirius."

"But, Moony, look at him! Look at him looking at Snape," Sirius defended earnestly, a playful smirk still on, "just wow."

"Shh-", James frowned, checking on Severus, "you'd wake him!"

But his warning spawned more ridicule, as Sirius faked being touched, "aww, look at you all being protective like a mother hen."

That earned Sirius a serious glare, "Sirius, stop it."

The other Gryffindor grinned knowingly, but did as he was told. Returning to a bit more serious mode, he said, "So, this changes things, I guess?"

Though it came out more of a statement.

James solemnly nodded, "yes it does."

"What changes what?" Wormtail asked.

A simultaneous eye-rolling ensued at that.

* * *

Things changed, indeed. His new relation with Snape had changed everything. No more bullying, no more messing around. There was just no time for those when he had to take care of Severus. Everything changed and he was no longer the same boy he was. The responsibility only grew stronger and James focused all his attention to take care of his former nemesis. Severus was in vulnerable state which he disguised with a blank face but James got to learn to see through the mask.

Now, he's practically unable to seperate himself from the former was surpring, though, was how accepting his friends were with all these changes.

Moony was very enthusiastic about it. It was clear in his face how glad he was to have an opportunity to befriend and thus make up for his mistake to his almost victim. The fact that James' friendship ushered him into accommodate the Slytherin boy didn't deter him at all. The way James perceived, Remus' just happy to have a chance to say sorry.

Though Severus never really responded in any ways to his apology. Well, time's not right, he supposed. When things get better for Severus, he'll might accept the sincere regret from Remus.

Sirius was not bad either, although he was occasionally rude to Severus. Mildly rude. And Severus…. well, he just doesn't care about anything for the moment, and none of the snarky comments from Sirius penetrated his numbness. Either that, or, he might actually be alright with whatever Sirius says.

Peter, on the other hand, was very ambiguous on where he's standing. Although he wouldn't go against his friends in welcoming Severus Snape, but occasional lapse into past jerking around showed that he's still require time to adjust.

It was fine by James.

He was sort of worrying when the school started and he had to bring Severus into his school life. The former relationship with the Marauders and the dark-art fanatic was not good, to say the least.

As it turned out, his friends were not the problem he should be worrying.

They were doing their best, and their best was good. While he displayed no enthusiasm, the opharned boy never complained about this new relation.

That was something.

But the school.

Oh, the entire castle was flabbergasting.

They gawked at them, jaws comically dropped, eyes widened like saucepan.

And when you'd think it's the Slytherins that make all the fusses, it was the rest of Houses that made actual fuss.

The Gryffindors, wow. The lions were just… wow. James never knew how much narrow-minded, pig-headed they were until he saw their reaction. The constant starings, murmurings followed them everywhere and everytime.

Even the Hufflepuffs, Merlin, those yellow striped badgers latched themselves with the lions and shared their suspicions enthusiastically.

They don't know anything about what happened to Severus Snape and his family. The aurors decided to keep the incident secret and it was not a big deal to do that. The murder was done in a little vilage that no body really knows, not even the Muggles. The aurors just handed the murderer to the Muggle's institution, which have performed all of the necessary works - that is, to put him into prison after a short and quick trial.

All the aurors did afterward is to bring Severus to the Potters and the Potters kept their mouth shut about the incident.

This is how the magical world was oblivious to the tragedy.

And this is why they were suspecting their friendship and making weird gossips around the castle.

One of which involved seduction potions, and there was one with … Imperius? Really? Is that how creative you people are?

Well, at least the teachers were accepting the change smoothly.

His father told them that the headmaster was informed about the incident for several reasons. But it seemed the old wizard hadn't shared the news with the rest.

So far, so good.

Until entered Lily Evans.

Well, everybody knows how much James adored and worshiped her.

Yes, adored and worshiped, past tense.

Lily was joyful about this new deal. It appeared to her that Severus was finally ailenating from the death eater's group and joining the good side, or whatever.

James knew Severus was not interested in that sort of thing. At least, not any more. He might have been, before what happened with his family. But what matters is right now. And right now, Severus was definitely not interested in becoming a murderous supremacist.

Guess this is a good thing. Lily Evans. Severus seemed to be glad about it. He showed more liveliness when the redhead joins them in lunch than he ever did with James.

If it were James Potter before the summer break, he swore he'd be swept up by his own happiness.

But everything changed, and he was changed.

Supposed this is a dream come true, for everyone. Lily's dream was that they - as in James and Severus to finally form a civil relationship, and that Severus to alienate himself from the Slytherins' gang. Teachers' dream resonate with her's. And Remus', too. And it should be his dream to be close to the red haired beauty, to be on friendly term and later developing to more serious term.

So why was he not happy about this?

Why was he feeling anxious all the time? Feeling unnerved and worried?

The golden boy did have to ponder too much, the answer came up really quickly.

Severus Snape.

Having good company to distract Severus from his grief is good. He'd be no longer wallowing.

But what it also did was to enlighten James of his feelings toward him.

The subtle changes in Severus' expression when the redhead nears sent a sharp pain in his chest. His stomach boiled whenever he uttered more than one sentence with her, when he barely talked to anyone including James.

After all those time together, it appears Lily Evans still holds his heart.

And James realised he holds his.

During the summer, Severus was all his and his alone. But now…

The burning sensation that never failed to drive the Gryffindor boy crazy was clear.

His feelings no longer belonged to Lily Evans, but to Severus.

* * *

A/N

Hi I am back

I know my updates are not frequent as I should be.. Sorry.

I told you I am Korean (if you read my previous fanfic, you'd know) and I am currently writing some thing in Korean. I know I shouldn't play on both sides, but I couldn't help myself. I'm going back and forth with Korean and English, which takes a bit of time. I know it's just an excuse, but I wanted to let you know what I'm doing while not writing this. I'm not gonna give up on this, I'm just telling you this so that you'd know my updates will be irregular.

Sorry if I make you feel like I'm not fully focused on this task.. but hey, it's a fanfiction, which I am writing for my own indulgence. Hope you would understand.

Good thing is that this one won't be taking too long as the previous one, because this will be a lot shorter. I'm cutting down all the unnecessary angst and avoidance and denial, etc.

Thanks for reading! And thank all of you angels for giving me feedback.


	7. Chapter 7

How funny life is. When you thought you have nothing to go on for, you still continue to be. Time was not a salve to remedy every pain, but it did numb the bitterness somehow. Severus could see how the summer has reshaped him in so many ways.

First he befriended his former nemesis and now he befriended with all of his nemesis. The change was odd and unexpected but it was not unbearable and disgusting. Truthfully, he really doesn't care anymore about their weirdness. Stupid and dorky they might be, Severus learned how James Potter was different than how he perceived in the past. Stupid, yes. Ignorant and rude, double yes. Ill-mannered, yes to that as well. But… He was not all that bad. He was…

Severus couldn't phrase how he really feels, but the time he spent in the Potters was not bad. The way his family took care of him, worried about him made him feel less lonely. And he was glad that he stayed there.

He was glad that he was not alone when he came to school, either.

But things changed.

Perhaps too many things have changed.

When he came back to school, he instantly encountered Rosier, who appears to be waiting for his arrival.

Evan asked a lot of questions and wondered about his home life - about his wounds, too. Severus answered most of them earnestly, touched by his worries and concerns. Except for the fact that he has no longer family and he had stayed with Potter for the entire vacation. He imagined, and by proper assumption, Evan wouldn't be so pleased about the last part.

And then there was another change shocked him. Lily. The former unrequited love he hovered for the red head faded so much that he barely notices the pang in his heart. He could feel how relaxed he was standing near her, watching her admiring and adoring James. It used to break his heart but now, only a slight bitterness bothered him.

If this is how things will go on, he might actually say 'I'm happy for you,' when they get together. Whether he'd be meaning it was unsure, at the moment.

* * *

"You have to break the pieces chunkier. If you crushed them so fine, the potion will lose the retention," Severus explained as he demonstrated.

James frowned and glared at his bubbling cauldron.

"Well that looked chunky enough to me."

Sirius scoffed, stirring his own potion. "You need to get new pair of glasses, then."

The insult sent a ripple of laughter among the Marauders. They were in an empty classroom, getting lecture from Severus Snape, the future potion master. The dexterous potioneer raised his eyebrow in disbelief. Amazed how undelicate Potter can be, whipped his wand before his cauldron explode.

"Be attentive when instructed, Potter," warned Severus in his stern voice.

Peter and Sirius giggled, echoing Severus. They loved it whenever Severus scorned James. The look on his face was simply priceless. The utter dejected, disappointed and pathetic look never failed to give them a good laugh.

Murmuring inaudible excuses, James started the potion all over. This was the third time he tried. His patience was getting thinner. His hazel eyes scanned the room, spotting how Severus commenting on others'. Snarky and sharp scolding was shot at the dumb Marauders. He grinned. At least, no one's getting a complement from Severus.

"There! I've done it!" Peter cried after a while.

Severus went to check upon it, and nodded in approval.

"Well, it's not a complete failure," laddling the potion surveying the texture and color.

James' face fell, another shot of bubbling jealousy boiling in his stomach. Merlin, he was a sore loser. He knew that, but he can't help it. It was so rare of the Slytherin boy to express any positivity, even just for being polite, that whenever he does to anyone but him, he gets jealous.

It made him feel like he was not enough for Severus.

Weeks have passed since the vacation and his realisation of how he feels. James tried in every way possible to better their relationship. To make Severus want him as much as he wants Severus.

And to some extent, his effort paid off.

Now they were getting along without any awkwardness and the school gotten used to the changes that they barely made comments on them.

Severus helping their assignment was another sign that their former animosity has diminished.

But he needs more than that.

Despite the progress they make, the entire process was too slow.

"It's getting late," said Severus, staring out the window. "Clear things up, we'll do this at another time."

"Oh, alright." Remus, who just finished his own potion, laddled his potion into a phial and started to tidy things up.

The rest followed suit, clearing the mess.

"Thanks for helping, Severus. You are really good teacher." The werewolf smiled, proud of his own work.

Peter joined Remus and compared his own work with his. "Well, at least, I don't have to worry about getting Troll."

"Exactly," the tallest boy chuckled, watching the chubby boy's slightly undone potion.

"Well, I doubt that Wormy. The last time you handed in your potion, Slughorn was not happy." Sirius shook his head.

"Neither was he glad to see yours, Padfoot." James countered.

"Hey-" Sirius frowned in mock hurt.

"No one makes him happy except Lily and Severus." said Remus while checking everything's cleared up.

A bright, proud smile lit James' face when he heard that, "I know right? He's just natural." He said as he slung his arm around Severus.

A slight red tint flushed Severus pale face, which sent a fluttering feeling in James' stomach. He so wanted to kiss him right there and then. Wondering what would happen if he did, James asked, "So are you busy this weekend?"

"Not really, why?" Severus looked up. James was so tall that he had to jerk his head up.

"It's the Hogsmeade day, we ought to have some fun." Sirius offered.

The Marauders gave him an anticipating look which Severus found difficult to ignore.

"Come to the great hall, will you? At 9:30." James added, expectant look lighting his features.

As much reluctant as he was to admit, but at that moment, his hazel eyes really did sparkled. There were torches brightly lit, and the light brown- mixed with green reflected them. That was all, reflection of light. Severus tried to brush off fluttering feeling inside the stomach at the pretty sight.

James was so pretty.

He had perfect face, perfect shades of eyes and all.

The Slytherin boy knew that of course, he had been jealous of his features years and years. But never had he imagined he'd be admiring his handsomeness instead of envying.

"Pretty please?" The taller boy prompted when Severus went silent.

He gave a small nodding, which sent a collective sigh of relief.

* * *

Rosier was waiting for him in the dorm room, awake.

"Where have you been?" he asked.

"I was doing my assigment for the Potion. Why?"

"Nothing…" he shook his head. Severus laid his things down near the bed and started to undress.

"It's just that you seemed to be spending a lot of time outside. You normally stay inside the dorm."

It was a while after when Evan spoke.

Severus was just about to sleep, carefree. But when he heard his roommate speak, he noticed how strained his voice was.

"Does that bother you?" He asked.

Through the dark, he couldn't see well but he could see Evan Rosier was staring at him directly.

"You can say that," murmured Evan.

Severus frowned, not knowing what to say. It would have been offensive had it were not for the fact that he and Sev grew very close as much as he got close with the Marauders. Since the vacation, and even before that, Evan showed that he cared about Severus. Regardless of his motive, Severus was glad of that. Though he was too wary to fully accept his friendship, Evan managed to distract Severus from negative feelings.

And for that, he was grateful to the boy.

Severus was sorry that he made the other boy feel neglected, if that was what it was.

"You seemed to be getting close with Potter and his mates," Evan said in as-a-matter-of-factly.

The dark-haired boy opened his mouth to say something that goes along 'none of your buiness' but closed. He didn't want to be rude with Evan. Though he may show interest and concern to Severus, he's still a pureblood fanatic. All pureblood fanatics have innate supremacism that makes them think they're superior than others. That sense of superiority often times make them exercise violence in order to display power.

Growing up under his father's care, Severus got to learn who is capable of violence and who is not. James, for instance, may be an arrogant little jerk who prides in making fun of others. But he was not a murderous and violent person.

Evan, on the other hand, was exactly that.

Starting up an unnecessary conflict would be dangerous.

"What do you want to say?" Severus prodded on.

But no response came immediately.

A silent moment passed between them as they stared at each other in the dark.

Finally, Evan spoke.

"I just want you to be careful."

"I will." was all he can manage in return.

* * *

a/n

Hi it's me again!

Of course, I got it, gginsc! And I am doing very well, thanks to you. Hope you are doing great as well.

It's the promised jealousy part! Hope you like it!


	8. Chapter 8

Severus went to the Great Hall to meet up with the Marauders. They greeted him eagerly and urged him outside, all playful and excited. He couldn't exactly shared their enthusiasm but followed their lead which led to a different path that ended in a Shrieking Shack. The black orbs peered through the shabby door and gazed inside the dusty room.

"And… why are we here?" Severus asked.

He admit that it was surprising to witness how the Whoomping Willow gave away path through its tree trunks which leads to the shabby cottage. However, his amazement did not bring any excitement that clearly was their anticipation. James' face fell when he saw no genuine thrill in Severus' expression.

Sirius clicked his tongue, "I told you he won't be interested in this sort of stuff. He's too much of Evans-type to enjoy this."

"What's that supposed to mean?" James frowned, offended by certain name.

Rolling his eyes, Sirius added, "The type that enjoy reading books and studying, not adventures, mate. We should've taken him to the Forbidden Forest."

"And that's not adventurous? All safe and sane choice for the book lovers?" Remus Lupin scoffed.

"Well, you like potions. Obviously, you'd like exploring new ingredients for that, wouldn't you?" Grinning, Sirius asked.

The potion genius realised that he really didn't mean what he said, and said them because he wanted to go there instead of here. Raising his eyebrow suspiciously, Severus agreed.

The canine animagus' face lit up by his back up, "see? Why don't we drop this village trip thingy and go search out … ingredients, for potion." He finished somewhat lamely, unable to feign excitement on that last part.

Scoffing, James countered, "right, and you'd be happy to dig up dirt and collect tree barks. Because that's also your thing, hmm?"

"Enough," Severus interrupted.

The two boys went silent.

"We are here, anyway. Might as well finish what we're here for," he huffed out sighs, and looked around, "so what did you want me to see?"

Severus eyed the room carefully. Remus and Peter cleared their throats and flicked their wands. The floor suddenly opened up and a gate appeared. The Slytherin's eyes went wide in surprise as he peered through it. There was a lumpy path which Severus couldn't fancy where it led to. They charmed each other with disillusionment charm. Peter got inside, first. Remus, then, gestured to follow him before going in himself.

The Slytherin's gaze met the Potter heir's. The latter grinned and gestured the entrance. Severus sighed and let himself fall into their scheme, flicking wand over his head to charm himself.

The road was very narrow and lumpy, like a cave. Severus was not a very tall child, but still it was difficult to hunch down while walking. After a while following the tail of Remus', they've suddenly reached a point where the path ended with a wooden door on the ceiling.

They've peered through it carefully and got out of the door. Severus realised, with amazement, that they were inside the Jonko's shop.

"Wha-" he stammered.

Looking proud, James slung his arm around the boy. "Shh- not here."

They got out of the shop and sought out a small alley way where they dispell the charm.

"How did that room bring us here? Did you connect the path?" Severus asked, face full of amazement.

It was well garuanteed, too. Making a path is not an easy job to do.

James chuckled, "Yes and no."

"What does that mean?" A frown furrowed Severus' brows.

"The Whoomping Willow, Sevy, was planted for Remus and the path linking the Shrieking Shack was also made for Remus." Sirius explained.

The potion-genius didn't enjoy being called 'Sevy', and he made that point perfectly clear with that dunderhead. But the Black heir, as per usual, went with whatever pleased him. It took a moment for Severus to debate whether to chastise him for it or to continue with filling his curiosity.

The result was immediate, curiosity got better of the Slytherin as usual.

"For his… condition, you mean?" He chose the wording carefully. As much as he was frightened by the memory of being haunted by a gigantic wolf, he was still aware of his own manner.

Remus smiled affectionately at his care.

"Yes, for my condition. By the headmaster himself, for your information."

"He's a great man, you know, for being able to pull one's head out of his arse and to see people for they are, not just… whatever shallow features people put too much credit for." Sirius stated.

They all stared at him, surprised by the unusual sincerity.

The canine animagus frowned upon their goofy face, "what?"

"That was… deep, mate. Profound." James said nodding his head.

Sirius gave him a light punch on the arm at his mocking.

"So… What's next?" Severus, unable to hide his giggle, asked, anticipating whatever craziness these dunderheads would present to him.

The Marauders simultaneously felt amazed at the Slytherin's laughter, for he never displayed pleasantness in front of them.

"Come and follow me." James whispered, eyes glinting in happiness.

He wanted to hold that expression on Severus' face, for as long as he could.

* * *

The day was perfectly imperfect as things always were with James. But Severus can't deny that he did indeed have fun during the entire day with the Marauders, sneaking into shops after shops, doing something incredibly stupid but oddly satisfying. Perhaps it was because he spent those moments with someone other than him, Severus guessed.

Being alone is very boring. To say the least.

Severus hadn't realised how much fun it could be to have someone fooling around, making terribly silly jokes and stuff.

They were just about to go back when James suddenly reminded of something he left in the Shack. He asked Severus to come with him. Oblivious to the other Marauders' all-knowing smirk, Severus said yes.

"Were you enjoying yourself today?" The taller boy quietly asked.

Severus' eyes rounded in surprise, he hadn't expected that question. There was no point in denying, so he have a short nod. James smiled happily. All those brightness and glee spread across his handsome face.

"Good, that's very good," James said. It was almost murmuring to himself.

The two wizards walked along the path in silent afterward.

Severus thought it was suddenly stifling when they were inside the Shrieking Shack. The creaking sound whenever they stepped a foot on the stairs were terribly loud. It made them very aware of themselves. The smaller boy couldn't fancy why he was feeling so vulnerable all of a sudden. It was just two of them, alone.

Alone.

With Potter.

As they climbed up the stairs and opened the wreck of a door which shrieked loudly, Severus turned around to ask what it was that James lost. Then, the Slytherin boy felt a warm breath ghosting over his face as well as a hot body pressing close to him. He looked up to meet a pair of the most mesmerizing hazels. There was something he could not fathom. Something so fierce and wild, yet suppressed.

Severus wondered what it was, until James opened his mouth.

"Are you afraid?" he asked.

Considering the circumstance, Severus might have thought the question was very silly. But he slowly shook his head side to side, showing that he was not afraid of anything from him.

There was a small grin adorning the tip of the taller boy's lips, which faltered quickly, replaced by uncertain movements.

"I lied," James confessed.

He appeared to be very nervous, a slick tongue darting to lick his lips, the lower lip locked in between teeth and then released.

Standing very still, Seversus waited equally nervous while the Gryffindor hesitated.

Suddenly, out of the blue, James burst out a laugh. A nervous one. His hand shot out to his hair and messed it up really badly. To the point of where Severus had to stifle his laugh at how funny his hair looked.

The two young men started to giggle like that, realising how silly they are.

Rolling his eyes in his own cowardness, James huffed out a breath. Heaving a deep, deep breath, he braced himself.

Severus snorted.

"I'm not going to kill you for lying to me. What is it?" Feeling the need to urge the boy, Severus prompted.

James gave a short snort, mixed with half giggle, and then said,

"I want to be with you."

In case Severus might ask what did he just say, James quickly added, "Severus Snape, I want to be more than just friend. I know this sounds incredibly stupid and absurd, and perhaps you might hate me for saying this. But I can't help but wanting…"

A hand reached up to cup Severus' cheek, which was blushing suddenly. James could feel the warmth of it. Severus was soft, surprisingly so. And smooth. Perhaps a bit fragile as well. And it felt so amazingly good to feel Severus under his palm.

"Wanting you," James managed, "I want you, more than just as a friend."

He trailed off. Unable to form proper words to describe how he was feeling about Severus. But he tried to convey them really hard, searching for anything from Severus.

It felt like a year waiting for his answer when James felt cold, skinny fingers touching his face. Tentatively, Severus slid down fingers along his cheek, stopping at the tip of his chin.

And everything just froze when their lips met.

They drew closer, slowly enclosing the distance and starting to feel each other. It was as if they were just meant to be like that, so welcoming and warm.

James could feel the pounding heart trying to escape its rib cage. A heat was pooling around his lower part, dizzying his head. He enclosed his arms around the smaller boy, hands cupping his chin and neck, locking him to himself.

Severus' lips felt amazing. His body pressed to him was even more so.

When their kiss ended, James rested his forehead upon Severus' sucking in much needed breath.

"That was very terrible, wasn't it?" He muttered.

Severus frowned, surprised.

"No, I didn't meant the kiss, I meant me," James hurriedly explained, half giggling in self-mockery, "I was trying to be romantic, like, really, uh… I wanted to tell you about how I feel about you at least more elaborately, and then, eloquence just escaped me-"

Severus hold a finger on his lips to stop him. Looking into the hazels, he suppressed a laugh.

"Did you prepare the lines?" he asked.

James turned beet red, closing his eyes to avoid the drilling gaze of black orbits. Now, Severus couldn't help but laugh. It was a small sound, but definitely a laugh. Which made James laughed as well. They giggled to each other's face like that, all goofy and silly.

"I am not answering that question," the taller boy stated, nuzzling into the crook of Severus' neck.

"Too late for that, Potter."

* * *

A/N

Hi I am back.

I'm sorry I came back too late, I was sorting some stuff out.

If you guys are still here with me, thank you.

I know this is total OoC, but who cares? I wanted to write fluffy, tooth-rotting sweet stuff with Severus, and I shall make my wishes come true.

I've done enough angst in the past. It burned me. I will not do it again, unless I come up with something worth writing for.

Anyway, thanks for reading!


	9. Chapter 9

"Severus, your potion's turning blue."

Startled, Severus hurriedly looked into his boiling potion, which was indeed turning blue when it supposed to be turning opaque violet. Muttering profanities to himself, he quickly added more valerian twigs. Thankfully, its colour changed, though not to his satisfaction.

Evan Rosier clicked his tongue in dissaproval.

"What's going on in your head?" he snorted.

The usually dexterous potion student bit his lower lip, his face turning slightly pink as he thought about the Hogsmeade weekend. He had to suppress it down, trying to avoid any further weirdness on his part.

He's been like this since the kiss, and as far as Evan Rosier concerned, Severus didn't wish for the other Slytherin to find out his secret.

On second thought, he doesn't want anyone to find out about his secret.

Not even Lily.

Definitely not Lily.

Oh, that's… That's just worst thing that could ever happen.

Why did he kiss the goofy-faced former nemesis, who is incredibly stupid and charming at the same time that made him weak-legged and dizzy headed?

He did not want to ponder upon it, lest he'll screw up his potion even further.

Severus could feel the drilling gaze of suspicion Rosier was sending in his way, and felt very self-conscious. He wanted to get out of the classroom, which suddenly felt too confining.

"Severus?" Rosier prodded.

There was nothing he could say, so Severus simply shook his head in reply. "There's nothing going on, I'm fine."

'The hell you are', was left unsaid thankfully due to the fact that Evan was too pureblood to curse out loud in classroom.

"Severus," Rosier called.

"If you don't have plans for the night, would you accompany me to the social gathering at Professor Slughorn? He asked that we should bring partners, for the special occasion."

What gathering? Severus combed through his memory and recalled he was also received invitation to the same gathering that would be held in the old professor's little office. He planned not to go, since he had no one to go with. Besides, he hates the man. Well, to be fair, he hates everybody. But that man in particular, he could not stand at the way he gazes students as if he was scrutinizing and giving assessments to livestock. Or well made goods.

Apparently, Severus was enough to consider acceptable product to the big bellied old wizard, for he was, in fact, belong to his 'club'. However, after all this mess and his lost of interest in becoming follower of the darkest wizard of all, he lost any reasons to pretend to endure the man entirely.

In other words, he was not going to go there at all.

So he was about to say no, but Rosier caught that before he could utter a syllable.

"Before you answer, I would like to point out that I do not intend to stay further than five minutes. Only visiting to keep up the appearances. And," he cleared his throat, somehow looking a bit bashful, "I do not wish to put pressure on you, and certainly not wish to be seemed overly attached, but you do have spend less time with me as the time goes by. I understand your new affiliation with the Gryffindors, and possess no desire to judge you for it. However, I thought we are friends."

That taken Severus by surprise. He never expected Rosier to say 'friends', or to consider Severus his friend.

"And as a friend, I believe I also has a right to ask for a portion of your free time to mingle with me," Rosier finished, with a determined look on his face.

Severus couldn't say anything, a sudden wave of guilt washing over him. He never thought Evan as his friend, too cautious of his motive. But come to think of it, Severus found no other hidden agenda from the other Slytherin and his actions.

It could be just that, Severus was too weary of human connection all this time that he neglected the opportunity presented to him, blinded by his own prejudice.

At that conclusion, Severus found no other answer than saying yes to Rosier. After all, it's only a stupid gathering. There's no harm in there, is there?

* * *

"Congrats! Congratulation on finally making your move and succeeding at getting a semi french kiss!" Sirius cheered.

James merely pushed his annoying face away, face turned red.

Remus looked so proud and happy that made him feel worst. Well, he's not saying that he regrets kissing Severus- Oh, Merlin, that was really good kiss, but having all of his friends trying to congratulate him for it was just… too much.

His heart beats faster whenever he recalled the moment, and he recalls that moment very often now. His face gets red, his palms get sweaty and oh dear- there's Severus coming to him.

"Hey-", he squeaked.

The Marauders stifled giggles. James gave them a deadly glare - which was no use at all.

"Hey. Aren't you supposed to be in class?" The uptighty Slytherin spoke in a slightly scolding manner whcih only made James smile.

"We're not ditching our class, schedule changed,"Sirius returned.

"Apparently, professor came down with dragon pox. He's in the hospital wing, but I reckon he'd be sent off to Mungo's." Remus gave more detailed explanation when Severus arched his brow.

"What about you? Are you free?" James asked.

Severus shook his head.

"I have assigments to do, I was just about to go to the library."

"The library? Well, I got some things to do, as well." James said as he quickly looked around his mates.

Sirius smirked in all-knowing way.

"Well, then, you two should go. As for me, I rather stay away from Madame Pince for as long as I could." The canine animagus shivered, as if remembering how infurious the old woman was when he was in the library last time.

"And who is the responsible for that?" Remus chastised.

"Me," Sirius answered proudly, "and you, Prongs, as well as Pete."

The werewolf rolled his eyes exasperatedly.

"Well, I've got extra study to do on Potions," Pettigrew spoke, pondering through his list of things to do.

And all of a sudden, he received the stink eyes from everyone except Severus. James, in particular, looked like he could put a hole in his head with his look, if he could.

Before the chubby rat could voiced his indignant questions, Sirius and Remus took a hold on him fast and they ran off.

"Well, now. Shall we?" James, pleased with their exit, smiled.

Severus snorted rather amused, and nodded his head.

* * *

They were working on their respective tasks in the corner, not particularly up for something romantic. Just enjoying each other's presence while doing routinely stuff. But James got bored easily, and stopped his work to appreciate Severus.

Long dark hair framing his pale face, a little frown creasing his brows. The way he catches his lower lip between his teeth and loosens it as concentrating hard.

He may not be the most beautiful boy in the world, but to James, he was just right in every way.

How come he never knew this? How did he fail to see this boy for the way he truly is?

True, he was dark and rather hostile before. Completely obsessed with the dark magic, and all that bollocks did have their ways on how he perceived the boy. He couldn't deny that Severus indeed wanted, at some point in his life, to put himself in that horrific place. And if he ask about it, Severus might answer truthfully that he did. Which is terrible, yes. But now, he can see through the layer of his desire and choice. And see what is really going on behind it.

It might have been a defensive mechanism, to protect himself from the horrible life he had to endure. Or he might have thought that that is the only way to gain enough power and control over his life.

Making bad choices is bad, but that doesn't mean that person is entirely wrong and bad. Things are just more complicated than that.

Bad things happened to Severus, so Severus made bad choices - which might appeared to be the only possible way. But in the end, Severus stopped himself and chose to move on.

That is something to be admired.

And admire James does.

"What?" Severus frowned.

James reached out and placed a warm hand over his.

"Why don't we go out for a walk? It's beautiful day outside." He said.

Severus looked up through the window and to James, quirking his brow.

"It's raining." He stated.

James shrugged his shoulders, "We could walk inside the castle. Don't you wanna know about secret places I've discovered?"

His voice almost purred, which made Severus blush.

The Slytherin boy shook his head, not really to say no but to shake himself out of flustered state.

"We-, I have to finish this." He said, feigning steelness.

"You're almost done, I know you are. C'mon-, please?" Shamelessly, James begged.

After a moment of contemplatng, Severus finally gave in. James cheered. They got out of the library, after packing their bags and belongings, and strolled around the castle with no specific destination to go to. James wanted to hold hands, but Severus was too uncomfortable at the idea of displaying their affection in public places. So James made compromise and ushered the blushing boy into a corner and kissed.

"You are helpless," Severus panted.

James grinned, "and shameless as well."

The smaller boy rolled his eyes, half amused. "At least you are not completely hopeless to be oblivious."

He closed his eyes, welcoming more tender kisses from the taller boy. Savouring the delicious sweetness, he whispered, "Do you have time before Christmas eve?"

Holding Severus closely, he nodded.

"Why?"

"There's a party going on with professor Slughorn, with Slug's club. He told us to bring partners." Severus explained.

James smiled, "are you asking me for a date?"

Severus frowned, "if you have to call it that way."

Giggling, he kissed his forehead. "Yes, I have to. It's a date, before the Christmas break."

* * *

A/N

Thanks for reading!


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